I remember The Witcher 3 as one of the best RPGs I've ever played. But... it's been nearly a decade since I last tormented a peasant with a game of Gwent, and you know how memory is - it's a fickle beast.

And with the remaster on the horizon, I wanted to take one final trip back through it to see if there's anything - besides the visuals - that actually needs improving. Now originally, my plan was to play through the Bloody Baron questline and then jump straight to the Hearts of Stone expansion as those two are just chef's kiss... but, well, somewhere along the way I... uhm, took a wrong turn and just kinda beat the entire game again. All of it!

So join me in this retrospective as I go over what makes the Witcher 3 so special, what has managed to stand the test of time, and what I'd love to see blasted from orbit... or, you know, just improved. Either's fine.

Video version of this retrospective (~30 minutes)

Morally Gray

To me, The Witcher 3 was always a game about characters - deep, emotionally complex, morally gray characters. But not morally gray in that usual "I'm a good person!... while casually leaving a trail of hundreds of corpses behind them" or the "muahaha, I just love the suplexing puppies" kind of way. I'm talking about the kind of morally gray where you can admit someone is a massive asshat, while simultaneously thinking "yeah, I kinda get why you shanked that guy".

And I very quickly remembered that nobody embodies this depth better than Geralt - our resident Gwent enthusiast and occasional Witcher. He can be a hard-ass badass, the biggest sweetheart in the world, an insufferably smug prick, or just a big ol' silly boy - all depending on who he's talking to and why. He's not the kind of character you can describe with a single sentence, and I love that about him. It makes him feel real, like the kind of person you could actually sit down and have a conversation with.

But you know what the best part of Geralt is? Even though you're in control of him and get to decide how he responds to people, he never stops being Geralt. Every choice you make is filtered through his worldview, which makes the game surprisingly tonally consistent. You can go from being a goodie-goodie-two-shoes to slicing up a bunch of old folks, and throughout it all Geralt just feels like... Geralt.

Now to be fair, the old folks were cannibals, but still. I doubt many people can imagine Spider-Man kneecapping someone's grandpa, but push Geralt far enough, and off go the dentures. And that's because The Witcher 3 understands that being a good person doesn't always mean being a nice person. It's a shitty world out there, and sometimes you just have to fight monsters with monsters.

When Geralt is serious, you better pay attention!

Choices and Consequences

Or maybe... you can try to choose a different path, because the game - much to my surprise - actually lets you make major decisions with serious consequences. Not all of them will impact the world at large, it's a huge game after all, but just knowing that you had a massive impact on someone's life is cool... especially when it comes back to bite you!

One of my favorite moments from this playthrough was, initially, a completely mundane and boring interaction. After doing a random monster contract for a random-ass dude in the middle of nowhere, I found out that he stiffed me on the payment. And so I... very politely, asked for more. It's nothing special. This kind of thing happens to Witchers all the time.

And so I completely forgot about this... until a completely different quest had me return to that same guy. Except this time I needed his help, at which point he also... politely told me to go fornicate with a fence post. Eventually his good nature won out and he offered to help me... for a truly exorbitant sum of money that I really didn't want to pay. And so I did what any gentleman would - challenged him to a game of Gwent!

Since my Geralt is more obsessed with Gwent than I was with Magic the Gathering as a kid, I buried all his hopes and dreams under a mountain of spies - which much like Pot of Greed, let me draw two cards.

Did any of this matter? Not at all. It was like 1/50th of a different quest, but the simple fact that my previous actions came back to bite me in such a weird and specific way is... incredible. And that's something The Witcher 3 does constantly.

So while certain aspects of the game definitely need a bit of extra polish - and I'll get to those in a moment - the characters, the choices, and how you interact with the world were just as top-notch as I remembered them being a decade ago.

I both love and hate this man

Combat Conundrum

But there are things that nostalgia definitely helped... smooth over, and combat is one of them. It's the very definition of okay, which would be fine in most games, but in something as meticulously crafted as The Witcher 3 it sticks out like a Geralt with donkey ears.

Explaining why is actually quite difficult, because there's nothing fundamentally wrong with it. You've got your light attack, your heavy attack, you can roll around on the floor like Sonic, parry enemies while yelling git gud, or just whip out a flamethrower and light some fools up. It all works.

And speaking of work, The Witcher 3 actually except you do a little bit of preparation before throwing yourself into a dragon's jaws. You can't just go 'CAVEMAN SMASH' and charge in. You have to figure out what you're up against, learn what its weaknesses are, and then you go 'CAVEMAN SMASH' while absolutely smashed on all sorts of dubious potions.

It's all super cool... on paper. In practice the combat is a bit too floaty for my tastes. Too... weightless. I imagine it's like that to emphasize how superhuman and fast Geralt is compared to the unwashed masses, but it just comes off feeling a bit... off.

Take for example this fight I had against a mage and his entourage. Dealing with the heavily armored knights was a breeze - in no small part because the wizard kept smashing them into the ground while aiming for me. But when it came down to a 1v1 duel, I very quickly realized that I can't fight fair.

His attacks took off half my health, while mine barely scratched him. So instead of an epic clash between sword and sorcery, the fight mostly consisted of me getting a concussion as I did combat roll after combat roll, desperately trying to get a few swings in.

And that's a shame, because I really like how the enemies aren't just brainless morons that run straight to their doom. They try to surround you, back off when threatened, and just kinda make life difficult... but in a good way. However, just like that time I got blasted with a rock to the face. I can't shake the feeling that there's a chunk missing.

So hopefully this is one area where the remaster can come to the rescue. Although that might be a bit optimistic of me, because reworking the combat is less like polishing a game, and more like making another one. Still, who knows? CDPR has surprised me over the years. Maybe they'll do it again.

You're going to see a lot of Geralt upside-down in a cloud of dust

Quality of Life

They certainly did surprise me when I realized how much quality-of-life stuff is already in the game. Little details that don't sound important, but just make the game sooooooo much nicer to play.

Like escort quests. Everyone hates them, right? The NPCs always run slightly quicker than your walking speed, but slower than your running speed, so you're forced to do this stupid 'red light' 'green light' nonsense. But The Witcher 3 absolutely nails them! You walk? The NPCs walks. You run? The NPC runs. You break into a Mach 10 sprint? The NPC breaks the laws of reality and matches you. It's great!

Or how about potions? The game wants you to use loads of them in super-specific situations, so keeping track of it all is a massive chore... right? Nope. You only need to make a potion once, and then Geralt will automatically replenish your stocks with alcohol every time you meditate. Now this does imply that the potions are fake and that Geralt is just a booze-hound, but if it works, it works. And this system? It works!

But there are, however, a couple of things that I would like to see fixed, and these are almost certainly going to be since they're so easy to sort out. If you've ever watched someone play The Witcher 3, you've 100% watched them accidentally light every candle in the room while trying to loot. The game really wants you to light candles, and that's something that I'd love to see extinguished.

Most importantly, though, fast travel in this version of the game suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuucks. Why? Because you can only fast travel from signposts. Which means if you're stuck in the ass-end of nowhere you have to open your map, mark a nearby sign, ride towards the sign, dismount, and then finally fast travel. Now personally, I don't need to be blue-balled by a fast travel system like that, so hopefully this whole mess gets an all-expenses paid trip straight to hell.

Having to travel to fast travel is just kinda... redudant

Hearts of Stone

And speaking of hell - that's a weird segue - I was honestly surprised by how much The Witcher 3 bounces around in terms of atmosphere and story. One moment you're doing a serious archgriffin hunt, then next you're being awarded the taxpayer of the year trophy by a Monty Python character, then you're planning an Oceans 11 style heist, and before you even know it, suddenly you're wandering through Silent Hill style hell. And the game slips into each of those roles so seamlessly that you don't even notice how insane things have gotten until way later.

A lot of that is thanks to the genuinely great writing and voice acting - the kind that can have you thoroughly entertained and immersed, even when all you're doing is walking in a circle in a tiny location for an entire hour.

I mentioned earlier how one of the reasons I wanted to replay The Witcher 3 was the Hearts of Stone expansion, and now that I've gone through it again... hooooo boy. I knew it was good. I've played it before. But even so, I was completely unprepared for just how good it really is.

Gaunter O'Dimm is like the perfect villain. He's a horrifying monster that's willing to shove a spoon into someone's eye just for briefly interrupting his speech, yet he's also perfectly happy to chill, kick back and dish out some life advice. And the fact that he can instantly switch between the two modes, all without breaking that stupid grin of his... oh, it's so good.

In every scene he's in he's just got such a presence that you can't help but stare at him. And I'd love to ramble about how much I love Gaunter O'Dimm for hours, but sadly that would require spoiling the story, so just trust me and play Hearts of Stone. It's going to become free with the remastered version, so you really have no excuse!

Gaunter O'Dimm is as awful as he is fascinating

Engrossing Story

But don't worry, I have another story to share - one that really showcases how The Witcher 3 respects you and your intelligence. While searching for a lost apprentice, you'll run into a group of weird old people. After talking to them, you'll learn that the apprentice got eaten by wolves, the quest will get a nice little checkmark, and you'll be good to go.

Or... you can snoop around, completely unprompted. Clearly these people are sketchy, so after following a scent trail - and we'll talk about those dastardly things in a moment - you'll eventually find their secret hidey hole full of corpses, both animal and human. You can then confront the old cannibals and learn that they're scavenging bodies from the battlefield since they're too weak and frail to hunt. A sad story, but not that extraordinary for the messed up world of The Witcher 3. So if you want, you can forgive them. Call them disgusting, but move on with your life.

Or... you can turn on your brain and realize they're lying to you. They have a basement full of animal corpses. You've seen them. They've got enough meat to last them months. So their whole sob story? It's bullshit. They're actively killing people, and you can punish them for it, which I did.

But at no point does the game hold your hand. You can miss all of this. You can simply walk away, report back that the apprentice got eaten by wolves, and the world will keep spinning. But if you keep digging. If you actually think about what you're doing, The Witcher 3 will often hand you a little treat for your efforts, and I frikkin love that.

So as far as the story goes, I don't think we need any major changes. It's still one of the game's biggest strengths, and honestly, messing with it would just be playing with fire. Why risk it?

Geralt is an effortless badass

Open World Madness

I wish I could say the same about exploration, because The Witcher 3's world is absolutely massive and just begging you to poke your nose in all sorts of hidey holes. Unfortunately, it was also built around the era when Ubisoft style games were all the rage, and that means there's *a lot* of time-wasting filler out there.

Does anyone really care about a random chest full of random loot guarded by random enemies? It's fun once or twice, but there's hundreds of these things throughout the world. And even though I did a ton of them in this playthrough, a scarce few were actually interesting.

But I'm being a bit unfair to the open world here, because not everything is filler. The Witcher contracts and side missions are absolutely worth doing. They're all little, self-contained stories that require you to investigate some kind of mystery, and that's always a ton of fun - even if the answer sometimes ends up being "a bunch of drowners did it". Especially since the voice acting is surprisingly good for a game with so much dialogue. I mean sure, you hear the same voice actors a lot, especially when it comes to the peasant clones, but honestly I can't complain. It's good.

What I can complain about is detective vision - *cough* Witcher senses - because this is one of those design choices that has aged about as gracefully as fine milk. Because as it turns out, having to hold a button and tinting the entire screen grey just so you can see clues is a lot less fun than just... you know, being able to just see the clues. And since practically every investigation revolves around you using your Witcher senses, it just kinda gets tedious after a while.

So if I had infinite money, this is probably the biggest thing I'd change with the remaster. The investigations themselves are great, but they just need a better way for you to actually interact with them.

I'm glad we've... mostly left this behind

Character Progression

And what are you even blowing up all these monster nests for? Well, experience and loot - naturally!

Unfortunately, this is where The Witcher 3's age once again starts to show, because its progression systems are... fine. They're functional. They work, but you sure as hell aren't going to call your mom to tell her about your awesome builds.

Each level up gives you a talent point that you can put into swordfighting, spell-casting or alchemy - more or less. And while there are some fun things you can do with that, the system is surprisingly barebones for a game this massive.

And that sort of thing extends to the loot as well. The game practically showers you with enough swords, armor and dog tallow to destroy the local economy. And for a while I was fooled into thinking all of this would matter. But it really doesn't.

Because as soon as you craft your first set of Witcher gear, you'll never wear anything else again. And it makes sense. If I had to choose between keeping my pants, or trying to scrape someone else's poo off theirs after stabbing them, I'd definitely stick with my own.

But it creates this weird scenario where you don't really care about most things you find. Epic swords? Trash. Priceless jewelry? I guess I can use it to clean my teeth. But poorly distilled moonshine? Now that's the real shit right there!

Now don't get me wrong. The game already has enough moving parts so it doesn't need character progression to feel like it's a second job. But after playing through it again, I definitely found myself wishing there was a bit more reason to care about all the little things you vacuum up.

And fortunately, this is another area where the remaster might have a pretty good chance to save the day. I've seen that progression and loot are both being spruced up, so here's to hoping all of my complaints will soon become relics of the past - just like this epic sword I'm just going to turn into scrap.

The gear gets quite interesting after a while

Up for a Round of Gwent?

But there's another reason to explore. No, no, no. Not a reason. A primal need! And that's Gwent! The only mini-game I know that spawned not one, but two spin-off games! Now while the standalone Gwent is kinda dead these days, Thronebreaker is a really fun RPG/puzzle game, so give it a shot if you like Gwent.

And I... I definitely like Gwent, because even though I told myself "I won't get distracted with Gwent this time", I instantly fell down that rabbit hole. My resolve didn't even make it through the tutorial.

But can you really blame me? Gwent is awesome! I mean, it's basically a broken, imbalanced mess that devolves into two players cheesing the shit out of each other for 10 minutes, but even at its very worst, there's a surprising amount of strategy to it. And that's mostly because of the three-round structure and how valuable every single card can be.

Let's say you win round 1. Now you could fight tooth and nail to win round 2... or you can just use it as an opportunity to dump all the garbage out of your hand, all the while forcing your opponent to dance to your tune as they just can't pass. If they lose that round, they lose the entire game.

So you can then put them through the wringer, and if you screw them over juuuuuust right, you'll end up going to round 3 with your best cards while the opponent has nothing but stinkers. And when you sweep the table like that, it just feels sooooo dang good.

And how can I forget the dialogue!? I don't know why CDPR decided to make inviting people for Gwent look like you're telling them their family has just jumped off a bridge, but honestly, I love the absurdity of it.

So personally, I don't neeeeed any changes to Gwent. I mean, I wouldn't say no to spies getting nerfed. Maybe make them draw only one card like in the standalone game, but that's it. I like Gwent being this weird little game with tons of bombastic, broken-ass cards. It doesn't need to be perfectly balanced. It just needs to be fun, and considering how often I went out of my way to challenge people, it most certainly is.

Gwent has no right being this dang good!

Still Gorgeous

And while I was running from one Gwent game to another, I happened to pass by a sunset that, even if I saw it in real life, I would've stood there and stared for a good long while. It was just... beautiful. And it also made me stop and reflect on my journey thus far, at which point I realized - to no small surprise - that The Witcher 3 is actually still a gorgeous game.

It might be over a decade old, but the way it uses lighting and atmosphere really gives it a really distinct and memorable vibe. Especially when you wander into some of the scarier areas, because let me tell you, exploring a haunted house with nothing but the light of a flickering torch to guide you is not something you'll forget any time soon. Doubly so when you have to put that torch aside during fights to use grenades, which means you're now stuck fighting a spooky scary ghost in near-total darkness.

But you know what I love the most about The Witcher 3's presentation? The cities. I recently played Skyrim and the cities there, even the big ones, are just... depressingly small. But in The Witcher 3? Not only are they massive, they actually feel alive! You can walk down any random street and see dozens upon dozens of people shuffling around, swearing, drinking, spitting and pissing all over the place. That sort of thing feels impressive to see today, let alone a decade ago.

The Witcher 3 still looks gorgeous, even a decade later

Puzzling Performance

And despite all of this, the game never stuttered or ran poorly for me. It was silky smooth sailing from start to finish... except for all those times I got shipwrecked, but that's unrelated. CDPR really spruced things up since launch, I have to hand it to them.

Most puzzlingly, I only ran into a couple of bugs, and all of them were of the hilarious variety. Like this guard that got stuck in an endless loop of bumping into me, his head going 'sproiiiiiiing', before blurting out "In a hurry?" and slamming into me again. Or the 'paint me like one of your French drowners' ragdoll poses I'd run into every once in a while.

But yeah, I can definitely see how the remaster can improve The Witcher 3's presentation. The textures and shadows are a bit dated by today's standards, but honestly? Not by that much. This is still an absolutely gorgeous game, and it runs great on basically any modern hardware, so I'm curious to see if the remaster can maintain that balance. Because it would be a shame if it just increased the requirements tenfold just so we can see Geralt's beard wobble in perfect 4K quality.

Songs of the Past

But what I'm *really* curious about is... how will the upcoming Songs of the Past DLC continue the story from here? I won't go into spoilers, but the Blood and Wine expansion has what I consider a perfect ending. Like actually perfect. Geralt gets exactly the kind of break he deserves after a century of being used and abused by the world.

And how do you continue that story without... well, ruining Geralt's retirement and everything Blood and Wine set up? Now Ash, you might say - just set the story before that. And that's what I thought they would do as well, but no. Songs of the Past is explicitly set after Blood and Wine.

So how in the world do you pull that off without it turning mean-spirited towards Geralt? Because we don't need the same kind of ending like in the books. Sometimes a happy ending is juuuuuuust fine. Sometimes you just don't need to mess with things. Sometimes they're good right where they are.

But... like a Gwent addict shaking in the corner from withdrawal, I'm certainly eager to dive back into The Witcher 3 to find out as soon as the Songs of the Past arrives.

Does the Witcher 3 Still Hold Up?

Which brings us to the original question of this retrospective: what makes The Witcher 3 special, what has stood the test of time, and what needs to be doused with bleach.

And after playing through the entire game again, I think the answer is surprisingly simple. The Witcher 3 is at its best when it lets you immerse yourself into the world. The characters are fantastic, the writing is excellent almost all the way through, and the little choices you can make give the adventure so much flavor it's hard to stop playing once you get into it. And that sort of thing is ageless. Even a hundred years from now, hipsters will probably still enjoy Hearts of Stone and Gaunter O'Dimm... in between fighting aliens in the water wars anyway.

The actual gameplay has aged a bit less gracefully, however. The combat is functional but weightless, the progression is nothing to write home about, and the open world has more filler than that sausage I tried a few weeks ago. But at the same time, none of these things really undermine what makes The Witcher 3 special. They're just rough edges in an otherwise ridiculously well-crafted RPG, and I hope that's something the remaster understands.

There's no real need to shake things up and make everything feel different. Even just a few bits of polish here and there, like giving the combat a bit more weight, making exploration a little less cluttered, or fixing up some of the quality-of-life things would massively improve the experience.

Because I went back expecting to find heaps of problems with a game I remembered fondly, and instead I found myself getting completely lost in it, all over again. So as far as I'm concerned, The Witcher 3 is already a bonafide classic. It has already stood the test of time. So the remaster? I see it as just sprinkles on top.

Now then - how about a round of Gwent?